Pre-Maturing Syndrome

Yeap, you heard me.
Most of my good friends are guys. I'm not the type to have a flock of boys round the hem of my skirt doing everything I ask them to, but I'm more the type the guys think I'm a guy. That's cool too, kids.
This is very stereotypical, so don't bitch-slap me if you think I wronged you. Just that the majority of the male gender around me really aren't so convincing. Really now, how many times have you heard men/boys using PMS as an excuse as to why their girlfriends are angry? The truth is, you cheesed us off not because we are having PMS and you are some poor little scape goat. It's because you don't understand. True, PMS does make us moody, but really now, it's your ignorance and neanderthalist thoughts that make us want to strangle you. Really wan.
I guess you can after all blame it on PMS. Not ours, but yours.
Here's your checklist on how not to have Pre-Maturing Syndrome:
1. Quit staring at my boobs when you talk to me
2. You like football, fine. Go watch it. At home, not at mine.
3. You can complain all you want about what shit they're giving you at work, but if you don't work hard to change that, you just pull your ears and sit quietly in a corner forever k.
4. Contrary to YOUR popular belief, the rest of the world are NOT trying to get at you. You don't need some ultra high-tech sophisticated system to protect intruders in your home via the front door, back door, slide door, long kang, ventilators, etc. Just get ONE alarm system and get it over with.
5. Aim when you piss.
6. If buying a plasma TV is strictly for football only, buy a cannon and propel yourself to Germany. Do it soon before World Cup starts.
7. Don't ever try to touch my ass in the lift again. I'll kick your family heirloom so hard that you can picture it's being yanked off by a camel.
8. Burping out aloud is not cool, and neither are burping competitions. Imagine your girlfriend and her girlfriends doing that to you.

I can go on and on and on, but I guess some of you will never learn.

But for now, I've to go back to work for a chauvinist.