Coming of age?

People say that your character and personality is shaped by the many phases of your life. Yet I sometimes feel that the phases of my life is being affected by my character and personality.

Why is life so deep? Eh wait, maybe it's just me.


In my Sunday random evaluation of life, I took a step back and tried to look at "me" from someone else's perspective. The harder I tried, the more predictable "me" is. Sigh.


If, really, the many phases of life is what made me ME, then this is where it gets confusing.

I think I grew up as a really shy kid. One who really, seriously, behaved. Not the ones who ran around like a loose monkey at parties. Not the ones who had disgusting food stains on their clothes. I was calm, collected, and quiet. Like Wednesday Addams.
Why was I like that? I think it was a kind of instilled fear of authority aka fierce mother.
And then as I grew up, and started to have a mind of my own, I somehow made up for all those years I was a quiet kid. Don't think I've stopped talking since then. School plays, debate teams, singing competitions and that infamous 'class monitor' position.
So I guess childhood has 'made' my teenage years.
When college days came, my parents thought it was inevitable that I take the path that every extrovert take. "Talk so much, be a lawyer la". The truth was, I loved to talk. But I hated the link that people placed on what I like to do with what I should be doing for the rest of my life. So I went to read law, but hated every moment of it.
So I guess my teenage years determined my career.
I'd seriously like to talk more about how tormented I was in college/uni, but then again, the mere thought that I'm over and far away from it now makes me feel like dropping on my knees to say thanks.
But ah well... so here I am now, a product of my childhood, teenage years and uni. Because I sloughed through my degree, I was determined not to practice as a lawyer. Because I was determined, I went on a penumbral career path.
Because, I am now here.

Love the job, hate everything else that comes with it.

Tomorrow is a half hour away, the beginning of yet another tedious affair at work.
And ME is here, because.